Looking Bear works at the thresholds of personal and social transformation to bring generational change for a more just, equitable, and sustainable world
Latest From Way Finding...
I’m excited to share this collection of poetry with the world. It’s been a project of passion and joy and it feels great to be able to share my work in this form. Here’s a bit about it… "Poetry, like all art, is always an act of co-creation. The invitation here is to see whether we can find, together, meaning with which we can live toward the liberation and healing of all. I get excited thinking about the meaning you will make in the pages ahead." (excerpt from the Foreward)
The work of creating a more just and peaceful world sometimes overwhelms people when we think about the gap we must overcome. Add to the enormity of our problems the prevailing sense of scarcity and helplessness that so many people and communities experience and you may soon find yourself wondering what good can actually be done.
One of the similarities I see in our species these past few years, is the way in which so many of us have had to put our mourning into deferrment. Whether our baseline suffering was high or low, whether we were already navigating unjust realities related to our identities, whether our bodies already held egregious levels of unmetabolized trauma, we have been encouraged by the forces of our time to put off grieving until some unspecificed time.
If you haven’t heard the silence of a subzero midwinter, you might not recognize how loud it is to we who have wintered in this place. The subtlelties of the landscape are manifest to those who have watched, and nearly indecipherable to those who have not. Among the cacophony of voices that sing of transformation and signal the changing of the seasons, your soul, too, sings of becoming. Can you hear it?
There is wisdom available to us when we cultivate awareness of the forces at work through us and on us. We can recognize the patterns, habits, and story-living that shapes so much of our unconscious life. Wise awareness allows us to trust the mysterious nature of creativity while developing practices for participating according to the deepest integrity of our values. In such practices there is joy and delight beyond what we often believe is available to us.
It can be overwhelming to wait for clarity to come in times of suffering. Like silt mixed up into clear waters, no effort can speed the settling of obscuring factors. Gravity has to do its slow work and stillness is required. The poet Pádraig Ó Tuama suggests that in times of difficulty, “small narrative rafts” can carry us, allowing us to breathe, get our bearing, and stay alive.
I was listening this morning to a man sitting near me in a coffee shop. To be clear, I didn’t want to listen to him – he was just so loud that it was impossible to tune him out. He was clearly someone who had an above average understanding of the political, economic, and environmental forces that were currently shaping our world. He spoke with great authority as his two table-mates listened with what appeared as a mix of skepticism and awe.
Whether you are a professional thought partner who coaches individuals and groups or a person who finds themself partnering with others by happy accident, listening is the most important part of being a thought partner. In fact, I would argue that it’s the most important skill a person can build.
It’s no secret that the experiences in our childhood have profound and lasting impacts on us. The way we are in adulthood is very connected to the nature and nurture of our first part of life. This is true of the formation of our desirable as well as undesirable characteristics. Reflection upon these formational experiences can be rich for understanding how our gifts and limitations in adulthood reflect deep-seated patterns in our lives. It can also help us see the way those gifts and limitations often come from the same place.
Once a third person had said it, I knew it needed to be addressed. “Sorry I’m crying, I didn’t know this story was so emotional for me” she said before finishing her introduction. I was facilitating a graduate course on the practice of Transformational Leadership, and our opening time together was spent sharing our names, their meaning, and whatever we knew about how we were given our name.
One of my greatest joys is sitting with people who are committed to creating a more just and peaceful world, and acting as a thought partner while they make sense of the web of thoughts, demands, challenges, and opportunities they face. Over the past three weeks, I’ve had conversations with various colleagues as they try to discern whether the difficulty they were experiencing was difficulty in which they should continue to dwell.
I was shocked the other day to learn that not everyone thinks I’m awesome. Well, not shocked so much as reminded. As someone strongly motivated by the creation and maintenance of good relationships, I find it deeply annoying and very frustrating that I cannot gain the affection and approval of every single person I meet. Truth be told, it knocks me off my feet.